I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize