Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I currently don't understand fingers.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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