just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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