Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
