I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
