i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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