i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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