We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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