i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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