I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize