just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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