so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
