watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize