Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
