My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
