so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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