You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
