I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Well I just put wine in my tea
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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