That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
