Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
