Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
As shirtless as possible
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
