what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize