office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
