My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize