I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
