Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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