He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
