It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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