PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Watching her eat just hurts me
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
