Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
