You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Randomize
