; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He has the fingertips of a God
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