I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
