its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
