just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
