Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You ruined the universe
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize