WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You have to summon your inner elephant
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
