dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
