If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
