I bet he comes in French.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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