whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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