So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
