The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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