Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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