Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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