just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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