so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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