Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
how can u be prego again
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
