The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
