the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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