Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
