I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
